Convert or Compel: A Revelation of Self-Righteousness | To The Church

I’ve been thinking about this for a while.

For several years now, the Lord has been working with me on mastering the art of temperance. (Click here to join my mailing list to hear about my progress). I possess the unique quality of what some may call militance (side eye) but what I like to call righteous indignation. I am passionate about exacting truth and righteousness even if it means stepping on my own toes.

The Word of God is right especially when I’m wrong.

God’s Word is my foundation for truth, of which I pattern my life after and strive to continually learn from and share my findings with all who will listen. Recently, the Lord brought to my attention an area of opportunity to check and see if my righteous indignation was truly a heart of self-righteousness.

My paternal grandmother passed away a few months ago and aside from her no longer being physically with us I recognized that my grief also came from an uncertainty in her eternal destination. When people die, particularly our loved ones, we have the knee jerk reaction to sayings like “they’re in heaven now”, “they got their wings” or “I’ll see you again in glory”.

The truth is, if they didn’t obtain salvation through repentance, the washing away of their sins by baptism in Jesus Name, and receiving the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues (John 3:3-5, Acts 2:4, Acts 2:38), according to scripture they will not be saved from eternal separation from God.

My grandmother was a PHENOMENAL woman. She was a mother, a giver, A REVOLUTIONARY. She gave us great pride in our blackness and reminded us that family stays together. She showed us that hard work, lots of love, the sharing of memories and good food (made from the soul) is a ritual in the gathering for our people and that we should never let it go.

She was also a woman of the world. For most of my life I remember her being a no nonsense woman that would curse you out if you took her money to fast. She didn’t drink but she was no stranger to pulling on a pack of Newport cigarettes while running numbers. It wasn’t until her older age that she began to develop an intimate relationship with God. She was baptized in her 70’s (I was blessed to attend her baptism), and as reported from her pastor and others she did receive the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues.

I realized that my grief from the uncertainty of her eternal resting place came from my own need for some big display of her relationship with God. I guess what I really wanted was for her to break out shouting and speaking in tongues in some overt fashion in church. Her sincere prayers and subtle worship left me longing for what I thought was the correct display. Days before her passing my father shared with her some things God was waiting on her to do. She was ready to obey God unto death and her passing was her release from her sickness and all other pains of this world. Her passing was also a release for me and my unapproved authority on the souls of God’s children.

I believe the bible fully and I believe its requirements for salvation unequivocally. What her passing revealed to me was that in my passionate belief in the Word of God and my urgency to share and see others transformed by it, I DO NOT possess the authority or power to make anyone do or believe anything. I have made the mistake many times of attempting to convert someone’s thinking about my God and His standard of holiness with my words alone. I realize now that my greatest witness is living holy and that alone is enough.

Not to be confused with keeping order and standard among believers, however the frustration, confusion, embarrassment and judgment that comes with enforcing my faith on those who do not (or will not) believe is simply unnecessary. In the process of discipling, as a teacher, I recognize that personal offense in the rejection of God’s Word reflects the undue responsibility on myself to convert.

And the Lord said unto Samuel, Hearken unto the voice of the people in all that they say unto thee: for they have not rejected thee, but they have rejected me, that I should not reign over them.

And ye shall cry out in that day because of your king which ye shall have chosen you; and the Lord will not hear you in that day. Nevertheless the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel; and they said, Nay; but we will have a king over us; That we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles.

1 Samuel 8:7 & 18-20 KJV

Conversion comes from the process of being compelled by someone or something.

This entire revelation through the passing of my grandmother and my desire for more from her spiritual life has caused me to think a little deeper, try a little harder, and study a little longer until I show myself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. (2 Timothy 2:15)

Ezekiel 36:23 says it best,

And I will sanctify my great name, which was profaned among the heathen, which ye have profaned in the midst of them; and the heathen shall know that I am the Lord, saith the Lord God, when I shall be sanctified in you before their eyes.

Ezekiel 36:23 KJV

My life is my greatest witness to those who do not believe. My LIFE is my greatest witness to those who do not believe. My life is my greatest witness to those who do not believe.

Who I am and what I do is the result of what I believe.

As I accept this, I am gradually coming to peace with my grandmother’s soul being at rest with our Savior. More importantly, I am accepting that God’s Word lived through me is enough. I will either compel them with my life’s witness or wipe the dust from my feet against them.

But into whatsoever city ye enter, and they receive you not, go your ways out into the streets of the same, and say, Even the very dust of your city, which cleaveth on us, we do wipe off against you: notwithstanding be ye sure of this, that the kingdom of God is come nigh unto you.

Luke 10:10-11 KJV

Are you compelling people to know God through your life or are you fighting to convert? Share a time when your life (conversation, actions, dress etc.) bore witness for you and allowed you to share the gospel of Jesus Christ.